Is your child unmotivated? Try these three simple shifts
The path to success starts with strengths, not struggles
-- By Jacqui Byrne
What does the stock market have to do with cell biology? Don’t worry—I didn’t see the connection at first, either. But for one twice-exceptional (2e) student, this analogy was the roadmap into a subject that didn’t come naturally to him—by starting with a subject that did.
-- By Jacqui Byrne
What does the stock market have to do with cell biology? Don’t worry—I didn’t see the connection at first, either. But for one twice-exceptional (2e) student, this analogy was the roadmap into a subject that didn’t come naturally to him—by starting with a subject that did.
Our student, Max, wasn’t just uninterested in the biology unit on cells—he was completely disengaged.
Traditional methods weren’t working. But Max had a passion for economics, so his teacher invited him to reframe the lesson: “Can you explain a cell using economic terms?”
Max’s interest sparked immediately. He mapped the cell membrane as the economy’s border, the nucleus as the stock market, and mitochondria as the workers fueling the system. Suddenly, Max wasn’t just learning about cells—he was deeply engaged with the content. His passion activated his motivation, bringing the subject to life. From there, learning followed naturally.
Why the 2e brain loves the strengths-based approach
When students have trouble with a particular subject or skill at school, the conventional approach is to focus on remediating those deficits. If a child struggles with writing, the solution is more writing practice. If they’re behind in math, it’s more drills. While this approach can help some students improve in specific areas, it often backfires for 2e kids. Why? Because focusing solely on deficits can erode their motivation, confidence, and love of learning.
For many 2e students, challenges in certain areas aren’t just hard—they’re exhausting. Their struggles might stem from learning differences, sensory sensitivities, or other neurological factors that make traditional approaches feel like climbing a mountain without the right gear. When these students are asked to spend the majority of their time focusing on what they can’t do, it reinforces a negative cycle: frustration builds, engagement drops, and motivation disappears. That’s especially true if those struggles haven’t been correctly identified and addressed; an all-too-common occurrence due to giftedness masking challenges.
Now contrast that with a strengths-based approach, where we start by asking, What excites you? What are you good at? This works because for 2e kids, motivation often doesn’t come from sheer willpower or compliance. Instead, it comes from engagement, which acts as the brain’s ignition switch.
When students engage with their strengths, their brains light up. They feel capable, energized, and ready to tackle challenges—not because they’re forced to, but because they’re motivated by curiosity and confidence. This aligns with how their brains are wired:
- Interest activates motivation. When students are genuinely interested, they’re far more likely to put in the effort to learn—even in areas they find difficult.
- Confidence builds resilience. By starting with what they’re good at, students develop a sense of capability that can carry them through challenges.
- Strengths create a sense of purpose. Focusing on their abilities helps students see themselves as more than their struggles, fostering a positive identity as learners.
In contrast, focusing on deficits often does the opposite: it drains energy, reduces confidence, and leaves students feeling like they’re defined by what they can’t do.
How to Make the Shift
- Identify what lights them up. Get to know your students interests or talents; then incorporate those into learning activities to get their brains engaged before addressing harder tasks.
- Reframe challenges. Instead of saying, “Your writing needs improvement,” try, “Let’s use your storytelling skills to explore writing in a new way.”
- Celebrate progress. Acknowledge growth in both strengths and areas of struggle. This reinforces effort and helps students see themselves as capable learners.
Strengths-based learning isn’t about ignoring deficits; it’s about creating a balanced approach that uses strengths as a foundation for growth. When we shift from a deficit-based focus to a strengths-based one, we do more than help 2e kids succeed academically—we give them the tools to stay motivated and engaged in all areas of their lives.
Let’s commit to seeing the strengths in every 2e student—not just because it’s better for learning, but because it’s better for them.
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Jacqui Byrne, FlexSchool Founder
Jacqui Byrne is the visionary behind FlexSchool – a network of small schools specifically designed to engage and support the creative, quirky, asynchronous minds of gifted and twice-exceptional (2e) students. An acknowledged expert and sought-after speaker on education, Jacqui is a member of the Bridges Graduate School Advisory Council and holds a degree from Yale University. She is also the parent of twice-exceptional kids.
